The sheer terror that I felt on being told I had cancer is not buried as deeply as I’d thought. It came right to the fore a few days ago when a really close friend of mine who I worked with up to 4 years ago was also diagnosed with prostate cancer.
Those of us with this disease all have our own personal story but, if there’s one thing we all have in common, it’s that a prostate cancer diagnosis changes your life in ways you would never have imagined and that’s just how it is for him and his wife. In the space of just a few weeks their world has been turned upside down and they both now have decisions to make that no one ever prepares you for.
People usually rally round at times like these and he’s been truly overwhelmed by the support he’s got. I think he feels like he doesn’t deserve it but considering the support he’s consistently given to others I’m not surprised at the reaction of the people who know him. No one deserves to get this disease but it strikes me as being particularly undeserved when it happens to someone like him who has always tried to help others and has gone not just the extra mile but several extra miles including raising money for both Prostate Cancer UK and Macmillan Cancer Support.
From what he’s been told so far his cancer looks to be both even more aggressive and more advanced than mine. Lots of men who get prostate cancer get the “pussycat” version, the sort that lays on your lap and gently purrs for years and years or possibly gives you the occasional scratch to let you know it’s there, and that could be why the myth prevails that prostate cancer is nothing to worry about. But a myth is exactly what it is because there are others, guys like us, who don’t get the pussycat, we get the “tiger” and some tigers can be more vicious than others.
Since what happened to me he’s been having regular PSA tests so, although his cancer has moved too fast to be curable it is, nevertheless, still treatable. Had he not had regular PSA tests his cancer could well have got to the stage where very little could be done but, instead, it looks like he will have several treatments available that can keep him around for a good while yet. I certainly hope so!
That’s why, as shocked as he’s feeling (as all of us who know him are feeling too!), he’s already thinking of others and encouraging the other men he knows to get a PSA test because although it gets a lot of bad press it’s the best indicator there is (currently) to ascertain whether or not you could have a problem with your prostate.
You don’t have to be in one of the higher risk groups to get prostate cancer – he wasn’t and neither was I (unless you count being in our mid-50s when we got sick). Whoever you are, don’t kid yourself that it can never happen to you. If you don’t get tested for yourself and your family, if you know him, get tested for Steve.